And a special welcome to those who have recently joined, it’s so good having you here!
The theme for this week is “Value”.
This week I posted a thread on Twitter about an insecurity I have, and it seemed to resonate with a lot of folks, maybe even you. That insecurity is embedded in a doubt I have about myself: Am I really enough?
I particularly feel this with clients. I doubt whether I’m providing the value they are looking for, whether I’m making it worth it for them to pay me their hard-earned money.
It gets personal because being a therapist is something I feel I should be good at. I’ve played the role of the helper ever since I was a kid, so this is my lane, this is where I’m supposed to be. Right? There’s a lot of myself and my self-worth that’s wrapped up into helping people.
This means that at times I’m subconsciously entering the therapy room looking for a sense of validation, an assurance that yes, I am helpful. I go in feeling I have something to prove.
Here’s what I’m trying to remember:
- My worth is not tied to my client’s progress
- I am not in control of my client’s progress
- I have a lot of value I can and have provided to many
- I cannot be a good fit for everyone, that’s ok
- There are things I can improve on, and always will be
- Everyone is on the path to becoming a better therapist
Do you ever feel similarly? Let’s reflect.
Come back to yourself for a moment now – take a deep breath, note where you are and what you are feeling.
Now consider these two questions.
Question #1: What expectations do you have for yourself as a therapist? Are they reasonable? What value do you know you provide?
Question #2: There will be many clients that will not be a good fit for you, how does it feel to know this? Can you offer some compassion and understanding to any fearful, anxious, or uneasy feelings that arise?