Welcome back, friend.
First off, I want to apologize for not sending a newsletter last week. Consistency is something I value, and I strive to be someone you can count on showing up.
Today’s newsletter is going to be a little bit different. Rather than dive into a specific topic, I’m going to pull back the curtain of my life and share some things that have been going on lately.
Let’s jump in.
So, for the past couple of months, I’ve been considering moving on from the therapy clinic I’ve worked at ever since I first started as a therapist-in-practicum three years ago.
A couple factors came into play for me:
- I’ve been an independent contractor at this clinic which provided some freedom, but also meant I did not have a consistent paycheck, paid time off, or benefits.
- The freedom I had came in the form of making my own schedule, working from home, and seeing as many or as little clients as I wanted. This sounded nice at first, but I came to realize (especially being a newer therapist) that I need more structure.
- I lacked a professional community. It felt more like private practice than group practice. I rarely interacted with the other therapists at the clinic and found myself longing for more professional community
Long story short, I applied to a new clinic that’s close to home, had an interview, was made an offer, and just last week I accepted it.
The Pros?
- I’m salaried now (consistent income, paid time off, benefits etc.)
- There’s more structure around the work I do (set schedule and client expectation, I don’t handle scheduling/billing etc)
- I’ll be working in person now in a small, tightknit clinic that prides itself in community
All exciting stuff. Well, I’m 70% excited.
I’m also 30% afraid.
With this new position comes an expectation that I’m available for 34 client hours a week. They said they tend to see a 20% cancellation rate per week so an average of 27ish clients per week.
This is more than I have ever seen and honestly, I’m scared of how I’ll be able to handle it all.
Thankfully, the clinic director I interviewed with validated this concern and provided some options down the road should I find this too overwhelming. He also stressed the support I would have.
Still, this is a tremendous change for me and I’m nervous about how it will all play out.
Here’s how I’m trying to reframe it though:
- Having an outside expectation will force me to face these fears I have (Can I handle a larger load? Do I have it in me? Am I a good enough therapist to manage it all?)
- Self-care will become more of a necessity. I’ll need to take extra steps now to make sure I’m taking care of myself. I’m hoping this leads to healthier rhythms that have been hard to come by on my own.
- The reduced financial stress will help balance the additional stress of a larger client load.
- I’ll get my necessary hours for licensure much quicker which means I’d be one step closer to striking it out on my own in private practice
I still have some doubt and uncertainty about this decision. I think it’s the best one for me and my family now.
I’m holding hope and fear at the same time and it’s uncomfortable. But this is exactly what I help my clients do all the time. These are the messy and uncertain decisions everyone must make in life.
We’re all just doing our best with what we’re given. We don’t have control over the outcomes, and that’s scary.
But it’s also permission to say, “Well, that’s it. I’ve done enough”.
How about you? Are there any changes coming for you that you’re nervous or uncertain about?
You can reply to this email to let me know!
Well, that’s all for today.
Until next time,
– Ben